I became a little more of a woman today.
I *simultaneously* steered a baby stroller with one hand, using the other hand to give pushes to a training wheeled-munchkin who kept hanging herself up on potholes. All the while I singing loudly and in my most Dory'ish voice, "Just keep peddlin', just keep peddlin', just keep peddlin', peddlin', peddlin' to the other munchkin who was quickly mastering only having two wheels on her bike.
While running 8:45/min miles. That counts for 6:00/min miles in real life, right?
Albeit, 8:45 is an average between a steady shuffle and many, many sprints backwards and ahead to rescue children and bikes from ditches, give pushes, reattach small foot ware etc.
Did I mention I had a spare diaper in my running bra?
Today I realized that my lap is much bigger than I thought. Two medium sized children and one baby, with an assortment of stuffed animals, snuggies and a book balanced precariously in front of my face can all fit. What I want to know is how does my lap reflect on the size of my butt?
Today I had a six year old offer to do my homework for me if I would do her chores for a week. Of course I took her up on it, but promptly had the deal backed out of when said munchkin realized my homework was in a 'chapter book'.
I've now de-gutted and explained the anatomy of three pumpkins, and none of them were mine.
I can explain a math problem, dictate spelling words and play peekaboo simultaneously.
I know the theme song to The Cat in the Hat, Curious George, Caillou, Martha Speaks and any other show on PBS.
I'm writing this so that when I actually become a mother, with munchkins that I don't return at the end of the day, I can laugh at all of my previous "accomplishments".
I should probably add that I also lit the toast on fire, and car seats confuse the dickens out of me.
I *simultaneously* steered a baby stroller with one hand, using the other hand to give pushes to a training wheeled-munchkin who kept hanging herself up on potholes. All the while I singing loudly and in my most Dory'ish voice, "Just keep peddlin', just keep peddlin', just keep peddlin', peddlin', peddlin' to the other munchkin who was quickly mastering only having two wheels on her bike.
While running 8:45/min miles. That counts for 6:00/min miles in real life, right?
Albeit, 8:45 is an average between a steady shuffle and many, many sprints backwards and ahead to rescue children and bikes from ditches, give pushes, reattach small foot ware etc.
Did I mention I had a spare diaper in my running bra?
Today I realized that my lap is much bigger than I thought. Two medium sized children and one baby, with an assortment of stuffed animals, snuggies and a book balanced precariously in front of my face can all fit. What I want to know is how does my lap reflect on the size of my butt?
Today I had a six year old offer to do my homework for me if I would do her chores for a week. Of course I took her up on it, but promptly had the deal backed out of when said munchkin realized my homework was in a 'chapter book'.
I've now de-gutted and explained the anatomy of three pumpkins, and none of them were mine.
I can explain a math problem, dictate spelling words and play peekaboo simultaneously.
I know the theme song to The Cat in the Hat, Curious George, Caillou, Martha Speaks and any other show on PBS.
I'm writing this so that when I actually become a mother, with munchkins that I don't return at the end of the day, I can laugh at all of my previous "accomplishments".
I should probably add that I also lit the toast on fire, and car seats confuse the dickens out of me.
